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Creating a sense of belonging

Belonging is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “an affinity for a place or situation” and the Cambridge English dictionary as “to be in the right place or a suitable place,” but what does the sense of belonging mean to you? And, more importantly, how do we increase one’s sense of belonging?

As humans, we have an emotional need to affiliate with and be accepted by those around us – whether family, friends, or coworkers. But what does it actually mean to feel like you belong? As a biracial woman in the workforce, I have struggled with this much of my life, unsure where exactly I fit. Growing up, this meant adjusting my self-presentation based on social comparisons centered on gaining acceptance, attention, and support.

As a teen and young adult, the need to belong meant adjusting behavior attitude, and striving to conform to standards and norms of those around me, often times leading me away from my own identity. One of the harder lessons in life to learn, or at least for younger me, was that the further away I got from my own identity, the less and less I actually felt like I belonged. The more I lost my identity, the more alone I felt. How do we create a sense of belonging?

Acceptance and belonging are cornerstones for building a foundation in gaining inclusion. One thing is clear, to truly be an inclusive workplace, we have to create a culture and environment of belonging. Individuals who have inclusive workplace environments feel respected and appreciated for their unique characteristics. This generates a workplace where employees feel comfortable sharing ideas and other aspects of their authentic selves. Which again prompts the question: How do we create a sense of belonging?

While I can’t provide an answer for someone else’s sense of belonging, I can tell you there are steps we can take individually to increase awareness for those to gain a sense of belonging. A good starting point is to:

  • Make an effort: Creating a sense of belonging takes real effort. Never stop putting yourself out there, seeking activities and groups of people with whom you have common interests, and be willing to continue to be engaging with others.
  • Be patient: Gaining acceptance, attention, and support from others takes time
  • Practice acceptance: Focus on the similarities, not the differences, that connect you to others, and practice awareness of remaining open to new ways of thinking.

A feeling of belonging is also critical for physical and mental health and well-being. Acceptance and connection can help us to identify the root of feelings and provide strategies for achieving belongingness. While we may not be able to define what belonging means to others, I believe that turning belonging into an action word is a vital step in how we, as an agency, increase our own – and others – sense in belonging. Representation and acceptance create a foundation to build belonging. Without belonging, we cannot achieve inclusion.