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Understanding and Helping the Suicidal Person
Be Aware of the Facts
- Suicide is preventable. Most suicidal persons desperately want to live. They are just unable to see alternatives to their problems.
- Most suicidal persons give definite warnings of their suicidal intentions, but others are either unaware of the significance of these warnings or do not know how to respond to them.
- Talking about suicide does not cause someone to be suicidal.
- Approximately 30,000 Americans kill themselves every year. The number of suicide attempts is much greater yet and often results in serious injuries.
- Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people ages 15-24, and it is the eighth leading cause of death among all persons.
- Youth (15-24 years of age) suicide rates increased more than 200% from the 1950s to the late 1970s. Following the late 1970s the rates for youth have remained stable.
- The suicide rate is higher for the elderly (over 65) than any other age group.
- Four times as many men kill themselves as compared to women, yet three to four times as many women attempt suicide as compared to men.
- Suicide cuts across all age, economic, social and ethnic boundaries.
- Firearms are currently the most often utilized method of suicide by essentially all groups (e.g., males, females, young, old, white, nonwhite) and the rates are increasing.
- Surviving family members not only suffer the trauma of losing a loved one to suicide, but are themselves at higher risk for suicide and emotional problems.
Be Aware of the Warning Signs
There is no typical suicide victim. It happens to young and old, rich and poor. But fortunately there are some common warning signs which, when acted upon, can save lives. Here are some signs to look for.
A suicidal person may:
- Talk about committing suicide
- Have trouble eating or sleeping
- Experience drastic changes in behavior
- Withdraw from friends and/or social activities
- Lose interest in hobbies, work, school, etc.
- Prepare for death by making out a will and final arrangements
- Give away prized possessions
- Have attempted suicide before
- Take unnecessary risks
- Have had a recent severe loss
- Be preoccupied with death and dying
- Lose interest in their personal appearance
- Increase their use of alcohol or drugs
What to do: Contact:
- A community mental health agency
- A private therapist
- A school counselor or psychologist
- A family physician
- A suicide and crisis center
Be Aware of Do's and Don'ts
Ways to Be Helpful To Someone Who Is Threatening Suicide
- Be aware. Learn the warning signs.
- Get involved. Become available. Show interest and support.
- Ask if he or she is thinking about suicide.
- Be direct. Talk openly and freely about suicide.
- Be willing to listen. Allow expressions of feelings. Accept the feelings.
- Be non-judgemental. Don't debate whether suicide is right or wrong, or feelings are bad. Don't lecture on the value of life.
- Don't dare him or her to do it.
- Don't give advice by making decisions for someone else to tell him or her to behave differently.
- Don't ask "why". This encourages defensiveness.
- Offer empathy, not sympathy.
- Don't act shocked. This will put distance between you.
- Don't be sworn to secrecy. Seek support.
- Offer hope that alternatives are available but do not offer glib reassurance. It only proves you don't understand.
- Take action. Remove means. Get help from persons or agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention.
Be Aware of Feelings
If you experience these feelings, get help!
If someone you know exhibits these symptoms, offer help!
Contact:
- A community mental health agency
- A private therapist or counselor
- A school counselor or psychologist
- A family physician
- A suicide and crisis center
Nearly everyone at some time in his or her life thinks about committing suicide. Most decide to live because they eventually come to the realization that the crisis is temporary and death isn't. On the other hand, people having a crisis often perceive their dilemma as inescapable and feel an utter loss of control. These are some of the feelings and things they experience:
- Can't stop the pain
- Can't think clearly
- Can't make decisions
- Can't see any way out
- Can't sleep, eat or work
- Can't get out of depression
- Can't make the sadness go away
- Can't see a future without pain
- Can't see themselves as worthwhile
- Can't get someone's attention
- Can't seem to get control
Contact
Oregon Health Services
Youth Suicide Prevention Program
email: Donna.Noonan@state.or.us
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